Any of you who haven’t seen Transformers (shame on you) should read no further unless you don’t care about spoilers or have already seen the trailer for the new JJ Abrams project on the net which you can see here: Click Here For The Madness!!.
So now that we’re all up to speed, it seems like this teaser is getting more attention then our favorite Toy Alien Robots, but don’t feel too bad for ol’ Optimus and Megatron, they still raked in $152.5 Mil domestically over the last seven days (a record for a non sequel, beating out old web head back in 2002). This JJ Abrahms trailer is currently under the moniker of “Cloverfield” though it’s not the official title of the film. It appears that the movie is shot with handheld DV camera’s, and the whole thing comes off as a kind of Blair Witch meets Independence Day thing (keep in mind the plot of the film is unknown, I just said Independence day because of the explosions). But to give a quick recap, a bunch of 20 somethings in NYC are having a party for a friend thats moving to Japan. Everyone’s having fun when all of a sudden there’s a loud noise and the apartment’s shaking. The camera runs out to the balcony to see a huge explosion in the middle of Manhattan (Peter Petrelli I bet!) and then the big shocking Planet of the Apes reveal of the Statue of Liberty’s head smashing to the ground below the apartment. All the while the same ominous noise in the background.
Call me crazy but I swear that’s the black smoke from Lost making that noise! The only people I recognized from the trailer were Lizzy Caplan (she was Art Chick in TV’s “The Class”, oddly it got better as the season went on, and she was also in the show Related, the Movie Mean Girls as Lindsay Lohan’s non-conformist friend, and I am proud to say she stalked Lana in 2 seasons of Smallville playing Tina Greer a shapeshifting krypofreak) and Mike Vogel (Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake, remember the guy on the hook and the toes on the piano, yeah that’s him, also I’d like to say the first movie set I ever worked on he was the star of the movie, nice guy, but wait a second, he also made out with a topless Anne Hathaway in Havoc, ok I HATE HIM NOW!) and that’s the only people I actually know.
Click Here to look up the rest of the people, you lazy bastards.
So the new rumors on the net are that this project has something to do with a work, or the works, or works inspired by H.P. Lovecraft. But wait, I just read a letter JJ sent to Aint it cool (yeah I’m getting like all my info on this from there, I know I’m a big jerk) and he says at least this website Click Here For The Mundane!! has nothing to do with the project, but that there are hidden websites out there with clues and one has already been found Click Here for the Boring I swear one of those pictures looks like this porno I ACCIDENTALLY downloaded once.
Either way no one knows anything, maybe it has to do with LoveCraft and this Cthulhu stuff about “The Old One’s” which are Gods that are like, old. Or maybe it’s more “Let’s wait a whole year to find out the Hatch is some dude’s apartment” or “Ben’s not an evil genius, he’s the Benedict Arnold Dharma janitor” Who knows. We have till next year to see what unfolds, but as for now I’m just hoping that unlike Lost they have an idea where they’re going with this thing.